September 2014

Please click on “Our Angel Abigail” to read the beginning of our Baby Abigail’s story.

September 1, 2014

No matter how exhausting my boys were today, or how totally outnumbered I felt, when it was time to tuck them into bed, I was reminded again how incredibly precious they are and how blessed I am to have been chosen to be their Mommy.  To have little arms wrapped around my neck and soft voices whispering that they love me … they are three gifts that I truly hope I never take for granted.

This last month has not been an easy one to navigate, and the upcoming future is daunting, but one of the biggest things that I have chosen to realize through this is to hold my boys close, love them deeply and stop for those little things like singing to them before bed.  If you are a parent, hug your child a little closer tonight/tomorrow, and realize how incredibly blessed you are to have the privilege to hug them.  Please, don’t take your children for granted – they are precious beyond anything else.  Good night, dear friends!

September 7, 2014

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Life with the expectation that God is doing something bigger than you can see — and better than you can imagine.

You are loved!

September 15, 2014

Although life isn’t always sunshine and roses (we spent the afternoon meeting with specialists and a social worker to determine our wishes for care of our Baby after birth … something I wouldn’t wish on anyone, although I am VERY grateful for our medical team – their knowledge, kindness and compassion are amazing) there is always beauty and joy to be found in a dark day.  My husband arrived home in time enough to be with me … feeling my hand in his gave us both strength.  Christmas shopping together, afterward, for our sweet boys and imagining their excitement.  Standing side by side, and chatting with my Dad, while we made 111 meatballs.

Life’s beauty is found in the mundane.  The everyday life.  Look for it – it’s there!!

September 16, 2014

Another day of looking for sunshine among the shadows.  We received word this morning that our sweet Baby will arrive on November 18th.  Nine weeks left to enjoy feeling her kicks and desperately hoping and praying for a miracle.  Truthfully today I am having a hard time seeing the sunshine through my tears.

September 22, 2014

Starting a new Beth Moore study on the book of Esther this morning and Beth’s following message really stood out to me at this point in my life … may it encourage someone else also.

Week 1 – Day 1

Esther starts out with “this is what happened during the time of Xerxes” which is similar to “once upon a time”.  Those Hebrew words “wayhi bime” occur 5 times in the Bible.  Without exception all “introduce impending catastrophe or doom.”

Life here is full of trouble whether in a sky-high mountain of small annoyances or an earth-splitting canyon of crisis.  There’s no escaping it until we escape these mortal bodies.  BUT in all 5 occasions where those same Hebrew words were associated with impending catastrophe, “the ending to each story is happy, but before that happy ending is realized, much grief occurs.”

When we trust our lives to the hand and pen of an unseen but ever-present God, He will write our lives into His story and every last one of them will turn out to be a great read.  With a grand ending.  And not just in spite of those catastrophes.  Often because of them.  Don’t just wait and see.  Live and see.

September 29, 2014

Tonight I had the privilege of getting to snuggle my friend’s beautiful baby girl.  To feel her soft hair under my chin.  To feel her baby wiggles.  To realize, yet again, how much of an incredible miracle a baby is.  And as I held her close, I reflected on that miracle.  That we are all miracles.  And that we do not stop being a miracle once we outgrow our babyhood.

I spent a lot of my 20’s in a dark place, believing the words that were spoken over me, that I wasn’t enough.  That I would never be enough.  Bluntly, that I was not a miracle.  But, I know today that those words were incredibly untrue.  That no matter how many bad choices we make in life … no matter how many perfect choices we make … we are still a miracle.  We are still worthy of realizing that.

You, with the broken heart.  You, who feel like no matter what you do it will never be enough, or you will never be enough.  You, with a happy home and a lucky life.  You all are also a beautiful miracle.  You were created with great care.  Hold on to that realization.  When things are good, when things are bad.  We are all miracles.  That never ends as long as we live.

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